Once the chemicals of new love which transform one’s sweetheart into the very picture of human perfection wear off, each partner discovers that no matter how compatible they are, there is at least one thing and sometimes several, that each dislikes in the other. Each possesses some habit, behavior, or personality quirk that annoys, infuriates, or disappoints the other person.
As the relationship goes on, the pair may remain very much in love, but their respective mannerism can become a source of perennial conflict. Each partner wants the other to change a particular behavior and each partner, even if they try to make the requested change, frequently fails at doing so, and the conflict continues. Such frustration can often cause one’s partner to feel great distress and even contempt for the other.
Research shows that nearly 70% of marital conflicts are perpetual and unresolvable and they can last a couple’s whole life. The only alternative to this is to simply accept that they are never going to change.
Here are some tips on how to learn to accept someone for who they are in a relationship:
1. Treat your partner as an actual being and not just as an object to be admired and to be possessed. Treat them as a human being that is capable of care and love. Respect them as a person and also accept them as equal.
2. Respect their Beliefs and acknowledge their opinions: You do not have to share the same opinions and subscribe to the same beliefs all the time. As unique individuals, one should be entitled to one’s own definition and reaction towards the world around them.
3. Accept their imperfection and embrace their flaws: But beware, there is a big difference between accepting someone’s weaknesses and forgiving a person’s abusive behavior
4. Understand that their past does not define them.
5. Don’t force them to change but guide them to be better: it’s unfair for someone to force another person to change how they live their life. As a partner, you have to respect and understand these differences. As long as you know that their decisions and their lifestyle are not in any way hurting them, then you have to accept them and love them for who they are. With patience and respect, they will grow and become a better person in time.
6. Never compare them with other people from your past.
7. Be proud of what they have become and show it.
The best possible way of accepting someone for who they are in a relationship is to be happy about their achievements and to show the world that you are proud of them. Remember, there is no ideal and sweet act to show your love for someone than to tell them that they are perfect in their own imperfect way.